Machete Kills (Me)

 

Now that there's all this new Star Wars content out there, I've been trying to put together my own "Machete Order"  for watching the series. It's harder than I thought.  For one thing, I haven't seen all of it.  For another thing, I'm not sure whether or not "chronological" is the best way to go about organizing the Star Wars saga, or if it's better to look for thematic parallels and such and not sweat the timeline too much.

Anyway, here's what I've come up with so far; your assistance is greatly appreciated.

Essential SW:

• Star Wars and Empire Strikes Back, the Despecialized Editions.
• The Phantom Menace (you know you love it)
• Attack of the Clones
• The Clone Wars cartoons (the boring cgi ones AND the kickass Tartakovsky series, don't sweat the inconsistencies)
• Revenge of the Sith
• Special Edition Return of the Jedi (for the Hayden Christiansen ghost, not the stupid song and dance at Jabba's palace)
• Mandalorian

Advanced Studies:

Work these in wherever you feel appropriate.

• Obi-Wan Kenobi
• Rebels
• Book of Boba Fett
• Solo
• Rogue One (I know people love it, but I can't decide if it's mandatory or not)
• The Disney Skywalker Trilogy

PhD:

Only for the hardcores

• Droids and Ewoks animated series
• Holiday Special
• The Wilford Brimley Ewok shit
• Donnie and Marie
• The Muppet Show
• The Muppet Babies
• Star Tours and Captain EO

I think that's everything.  I'd like to remind everybody that the Expanded Universe novels, comics, and video games are consistently more fun and enjoyable than any of the films or TV shows, and that your Boba Fett figure did NOT have a firing rocket despite how vividly you remember it.